Members of the Oklahoma Legislature listen as Governor Kevin Stitt delivers the State of the State Address in the chamber of the state Capitol on February 3, 2025. (Photo by Kyle Phillips/For Oklahoma Voice)
It’s that dreaded time of year again.
That leads into the legislative session when lawmakers unveil their biggest plans to Make Oklahoma Great Again.
At least in their minds.
For those of us who live in reality, it’s what I like to call political silly season. Because it is the agonizing period for legislators to reveal ideas that are actually ridiculous and aimed at making our state more dangerous, taking away our freedoms or bringing more government interference into our lives. And it’s all under the guise that we need it – because why don’t we know what’s good for ourselves?
Every year, some of the bills make me laugh out loud while others make me question whether those we sent to represent us in the State have any common sense. But some in this lot feel even worse than normal as lawmakers seek to increase their currents by scoring cheap political points before this year’s elections.
For example, who among us wants to turn Oklahoma into Florida by creating alligator-infested ponds and lakes with carnivorous reptiles?
Because that is exactly what will happen if we move forward with Senate Bill 2087harebrained proposal would remove permit requirements for people who want to breed alligators hatched from eggs in captivity. Currently, in order to raise an alligator, a pet owner must obtain permission and a written permit from the Oklahoma Department of Wildlife Conservation, which is as it should be.
We all know well-meaning pet owners who are convinced they can take care of an exotic animal until their life circumstances change or a creature gets too big or stops being a cute baby.
Releasing unwanted pets into the environment is one way invasive species are spread. Such a law will have people releasing alligators into local waterways. Alligators, by the way, lay 30 eggs each time they mate.
It won’t be long before some of our lakes and rivers are unsafe to swim in.
But I guess that explains why a month of tax-free holidays might be needed for gun purchases: alligator protection.
Senate Bill 1278 strangely proposes to create a sales tax holiday for gun owners every July. With the threat of mass shootings and domestic violence, how about our priorities considering giving tax breaks to gun owners when we’re not doing the same for Oklahomans who need to buy school, baby and period supplies?
Then we have the Republican lawmakers who are convinced that someone is intentionally injecting or release chemicals into our airspace with the “express purpose of affecting temperature, weather or sunlight intensity.”
Last I checked, our lawmakers aren’t supposed to be conspiracists. These measures they seem to be embracing the debunked “chemtrail” conspiracy theory. where believers are convinced that the normal condensation trails left naturally in our atmosphere by airplanes are actually chemical agents designed to interfere with the sun, the weather or are a subtle way to manipulate us psychologically.
good lord
This seems largely aimed at cloud seeding, which adds tiny particles to the atmosphere, in an effort to stimulate rain during a severe drought. Although the benefits of this technology are still unproven after 80 years, as far as I’m concerned, if we’re in the middle of a horrendous drought and a farmer and rancher wants to try to produce rain on their property, more power to them.
And what are we going to do, arrest Mother Nature for messing with the jet stream? Investigating governors in our west for flying over our state to avoid massive snow storms and heat waves?
Then there are the legislators who somehow see logic in a state agency charged with enforcing liquor laws being tasked with licensing strippers. I can think of fewer things that rank higher on the gross factor scale than men judging a woman’s decision to dance in a club.
Why shouldn’t an 18 year old be allowed to shave if he wants to? In our state, you are an adult when you turn 18.
Supporters of the measure say it’s designed to prevent human trafficking and force women into unwanted sex work, but I can see that easily going sideways if we let bad, prudish lawmakers get their way.
Lyrics meaning: And then don’t start on me House Joint Resolution 1040which seeks to re-ban Sharia Law in this state.
We don’t have Sharia Law in Oklahoma as much as Republicans who want to fear it would like us to.
In 2010, voters tried to ban Sharia Law. A federal judge found the plan unconstitutional and said Oklahoma could not. The state had to pay the plaintiff’s attorney’s fees.
That should be the end of it, but 16 years later, are we going to try this again? Isn’t that the definition of insanity? What a colossal waste of our precious time and resources.
Let’s also not forget that a plethora of dumb bills presented last year are still alive. Those include double criminalizing shopping cart theft, giving stormchasers law enforcement powers and sending homeless people on one-way trips to other states.
One thing that is different – ​​but scarier – as time goes on: It’s becoming impossible to know which bills will meet an early death and which will happily advance through our Republican leadership.
We can only hope that the legislators remember what they are actually supposed to do and not get bogged down by delusions of alligators, strip clubs and conspiracy theories.
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